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“I’m sorry Kate. I don’t love you anymore.”
I stopped walking… Maybe I didn’t hear what Kyle had said
correctly…
“It’s over Kate.” he said, making his voice more audible
to me.
I turned my head to him and saw his serious face and I
tried the words to reply to him.
“Why?” I finally managed to say, becoming more concerned
staring at his soft blue eyes. No not his soft blue eyes, but a pair of hard
blue eyes. Sensing that he’s telling the truth.
“I have to leave you. I realized I can’t love you.” he
said and moved away from me.
I just stood there where I am standing with all the other
embraced and holding couples strolling past me… I felt a shock of pain that
paralyzed my whole body. Numb... And when I was finally able to move, I ran
away from him...
“Kate wait!” he exclaimed stretching his hand.
Not even his body would go. He just stayed where he was
unable to move.
“I’m sorry.” he murmured as a teardrop fell on his eyes
and he started to walk once again through the park.
I burst in to tears as I ran. I wanted to run away from
him so quickly, not wanting him to see my tears.
It’s a cold
December night and Christmas is coming. I’ve just had my birthday and I’m
supposed to be happy but I felt only pain. I arrived home and was greeted with
my disappointed Mom.
“Kate! How many times do I have to remind you to be home
before dinner.” she said sternly at me.
She suddenly stopped talking and her face became
concerned as she saw my swollen eyes. She took a closer look at me and placed
her hands on my face.
“Dear, is something wrong?” she asked as she stroked my
hair, her voice all with all the motherly tenderness and comfort…
“No Mom. I just had a little fight with Kyle.” I said
feeling that want to cry once again.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No thanks. I just want to be alone for a while.” I said
quickly as I kissed her and ran up to my room.
I went to my room and what a disaster. I forgot to clean
up my things before I left. Books, notebooks and test papers with a line of 7’s
and everything are scattered. I began to pick them one by one.
As I finished
arranging my things, I found a short envelope, which I forgot to open. Kyle
gave it. I flapped it open and a picture fell. I quickly took it and looked at
it. A picture of us…
I held the
picture firmly at first then eyeing my small trashcan I had the sudden urge to
throw it. But, I just simply held on to
the picture as memories began to fill my head…
We met on a Saturday, at a party where several school
organizations get together… As a member and the President of my club, I came to
the party with Jean my best friend who, for my opinion, has looks that is to
die for.
“Hi Kate don’t just stand there! Meet some people.” Jean
said as she tugged me to the center where some people are having conversation.
I became more nervous as she grabbed my hand and spoke casually to a group.
“Hi guys!”
The people in the circle stopped talking and stared at
us. Suddenly a guy said cheerfully.
“Hi Jean.” he said.
“Hi Kyle!” Jean said quickly then eyed me, making me more
conscious than ever.
“So Jean, is she your friend?” Kyle said to her as he
looked at me.
“I want you to meet my best friend, Kate.” she said
proudly as if I’m her prized trophy.
“Hi Kyle. It’s nice to meet you.” I said stiffly.
Kyle stretched his hand to me for a handshake.
“Hello Kate, nice to meet you too.” he said with a smile.
I observed his face. I can’t believe how cute this guy
is! Probably every girl he knows is dying to go out with him. Suddenly I remembered
that I was still holding his hand and his on mine, it was warm. Quickly, I let
go of my hand and Kyle did the same. I felt my hand a little shaky and placed
it behind me while Jean introduced me to all of Kyle’s friends.
“So guys, what are your plans this weekend?” Jean asked.
All Kyle’s friends turned to face Jean, wondering why
Jean is asking about their plans this coming weekend.
“Our plans?” they questioned us.
I quickly grabbed her hand as I hissed for only her to
hear, “The nerve of you Jean.”
“Be quiet Kate. You’re getting me embarrassed in front of
Kyle’s cute friends.” she whispered back
I posed a slight smile to Kyle and his friends and
quickly announced that we are going as I tugged Jean quickly. Someone called my
name. I quickly turned my head and saw Kyle waving and walking to me.
“Wait Kate.” he said as he caught up with us.
“Yes?” I said
quickly, already embarrassed at the sudden blush I could feel.
“About Jean’s question----we----.” Kyle said slowly,
showing deep thought.
“Where?” Jean said excitedly
“Quiet.” I said as I nearly place my hand to her mouth.
“We’re going to the ice skating rink at the mall to
practice hockey.” Jake cut in from behind.
“Hockey?” Jean exclaimed, amazed.
“Yes hockey. You can come and watch the practice. After
practice, we just go skating. So be sure to bring your ice skates.” Kyle said
again eyeing us.
I wanted to decline but it was too late. Jean spoke for
each of us, completely forgetting that I am not the type who just says ‘yes’ to
an invitation.
“Oh sure. We’d love to. Right Kate?” Jean said proudly as
she turned to me.
“Sure.” I said shortly.
“We’ll be expecting you guys there on Sunday. 4:00 p.m.
at the rink.” Jake said as he turned away.
When the party was over and Jean and I left, I walked
quickly nearly dragging Jean out.
“I will never go with you anymore. Even if you’re the
only person I know.” I said as I went to the bus stop.
“You’re so unfair.” Jean murmured.
“What now? Do you want me to feel guilty?” I asked her.
“It’s time that you have a life. You’re always busy with
the club.” Jean said argued.
The bus arrived and opened its door. I quickly walked up
the stairs, while Jean saw Kyle.
“What is this time?” I asked impatiently as I noticed
Jean not even following.
“It’s Kyle. He wants to give us a ride.” Jean said with a
smile.
“Hey lady, are you coming up?” The conductor asked
impatiently.
“Just a minute.”
I answered, completely ignoring Jean’s smile..
I quickly walked inside the bus and sat. The nerve of
her! She waved to him and went up in the bus and sat beside me.
“See what you have done. You snubbed Kyle” she said with
a pout.
“So what? I just went to that party for the sake of the
grade.” I answered as I leaned by the window, noticing a car hovering at the
lane.
“Hey, that’s Kyle’s civic car. How sweet of him to follow
us.” Jean dreamily said.
To my irritation, I let her go on about Kyle while I, on
the other hand, tried hard not to hear her, and in the end, fell asleep. I
opened my eyes just in time to see my stop. I quickly stood up. Seeing Jean’s
disappointed face.
“You just slept while I was talking about Kyle’s cute
friends.” she said.
“Sorry, I’m not in the mood to talk.” I said softly as I
walked out of the bus.
After getting out of the bus. I walked briskly.
“I’m sorry Kate. I’m such a blabber mouth.” Jean said as
we walked.
I don’t know how it happened, but suddenly, we were
talking about Kyle’s friends. Jean finally admitted that she likes Jake. She
spent most of the time talking how cute Jake was.
“Enough about Jake. Let’s talk about K-Y-L-E.” she
spelled out to me.
“Huh? Kyle, why in the world would I want to talk about
him?” I asked as my face melted in embarrassment.
“Oooohhh! She’s denying it!!!” Jean joked, then added
under a whisper used only for secrets, “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone.” Then
she giggled.
I focused my eyes ahead, finally seeing my house.
“Kyle, seems to be the type of guy, who’s sweet, caring
and all the things that any girl will like.” I said quickly.
“From the look in your eyes, I’m guessing that you are
interested to him.” Jean assessed as we stopped in front of the garage.
“You want to come in?” I asked quickly opening the gate.
“No thanks. Just answer my question.” she said pointedly.
“Me, interested well-----um---.” I said stiffly… Why
can’t I lie?
“Gotcha! You’re interested.” she teased me once more
before we parted.
I went inside quickly and kissed my Mom. We ate dinner
and I talked about how the party was. I also asked her to give me permission to
go to the skating rink on Sunday… why I did that when I didn’t want to go was
completely oblivious to me.
I finished dinner then I went to my room and picked my
cordless phone to dial Jean’s number.
“Hi Jean. I can go tomorrow. I’ll be expecting you here
at my house around 3:30 ok?” I said.
“Sure. Wear your best style so Kyle will notice you!” she
said dreamily.
“Quit it, will you?” I said sarcastically and I hung up.
***
Sunday… I got ready at 3:30 and Jean is waiting at the
living room. I’m sizing myself in front of the mirror. My outfit, black tights
with a matching sweater… the sweater a little tight… My hair tied in a bun. I
took my pair of ice skates and pushed it in my bag as I hurried to the living
room to meet Jean.
“Hi Jean. Sorry I’m late. Let’s go.” I said.
“Is that you Kate?” she asked as she looked at me with
wide eyes.
“Silly! It’s me.” I said as we go out.
We left and went straight to the ice skating rink. We
lined up immediately to the ticket booth where the tickets are sold. Then, we
went to the lockers and put our bags in. Inside the ice skating rink, Jean saw
Kyle’s friends, so she waved her hand and exclaimed.
“Hi guys. We’re here!” Jean flashing her thousand watts
smile.
All the people in the skating rink turned to Jean and me.
Quickly Kyle’s friends went to us. They all look so handsome with their hockey
uniforms- Blue Jays.
“We still need to finish our practice. Don’t worry, this
won’t take long. We’ve been practicing for an hour now. We only have to do a
few more runs and after that we can skate.” Jake said cheerfully.
I just sat still in my seat. Feeling shy and the nerve of
me to go with Jean. Anyway, I don’t mind. Because, I finally admitted, I also
wanted to see Kyle… and his friends.
“Hi Jean, Kate.” Kyle said as he glided towards us, holding
his hockey stick.
“Hello Kyle.” I said as I stood up.
“Can you guys stay here? It won’t take long.” he said
cheerfully as he skated back in the rink.
I sat down and focused my attention to him as he
gracefully skated.
Watching them with awe, I patiently wait. Ten minutes
passed and I didn’t notice that their runs are finished. Jean is finished
putting her skates.
“You go first. I’ll catch up.” I said as I started pulling my skates.
It only took me a few minutes to put my skates on. I
began to stand up and step to the ice. I tried first to balance before skating.
I moved slowly at first, not wanting to showing off.
“What are you doing Kate? Skate now!” Jean yelled at me.
I just smiled back and tried to concentrate while skating
on my own. Suddenly, a hand tapped over my shoulder and I turned around. It was
Kyle. He just finished changing his attire from his jersey to his casual
clothes.
“Hi.” Kyle said as he skated in front of me.
“Hi.” I answered looking at him.
A mellow music started to play, making me want to skate
by myself but Kyle spoke…
“Would you like to skate with me?” he smiled as he
extended his hand towards me.
I wanted to decline but the offer and his smile is so
sweet that I didn’t have the heart to refuse him.
“Okay.” I said as I extended my hand for him to hold.
We danced in the ice in perfect beat. Since it’s my first
time to skate with a guy on ice, I noticed that my speed is out of control and
I’m heading to the railing of the rink.
“Oh no!” I said as I tried to turn my skates sideways for
a brake.
Someone caught me and directed me to the center of rink
just in time before I could hit the railing. I just closed my eyes not knowing
what could happen next.
Stupid me.
“Are you alright?” Kyle asked me while he was held me
close in his arms.
Kyle… of course… He would save a girl from plummeting
into the clear wall…
I was flattered, even Jean stared at me with amazement.
We quickly loosened our grip.
“Oh, I’m okay. I just lost control of my speed… I’m not
used skating with a partner.” I said calmly as I moved a few feet away
I felt total embarrassment. But Kyle went towards me,
caught my hand and held it.
“Dance with me again.” he said, tugging me to the center
of the ice.
I was spellbound, the way he moves so gracefully. I
suddenly felt that we’re so close. I looked up at him as he looked down at me.
“You’re not a bad skater after all Kate.” He murmured.
“Thanks.” I managed to say.
We had fun with Kyle’s friends. Until around 7:00 p.m.,
then I had to go before I could be late for dinner. Kyle offered to give us a
ride back home. I finally said yes. We got into his car- Jean quickly going to
the backseat of the car after a quick wink, leaving me at the passenger seat.
“I’m sorry, if I dozed off in the rink.” I said quietly
as he started the engine.
“That’s fine. It happens. It’s a good thing that you
didn’t hit the railing.” he said as he drove.
The conversation was interesting. We laughed at all the
funny things happened in the rink. I realized that Jean is not talking… She’s
quiet the whole time we are in the car- which is unusual. Kyle dropped her off
first.
“Bye Kyle. Thanks for the ride.” Jean said slipped out of
the car.
“You’re welcome.” he said.
Now it’s my turn. He pulled over beside the gate I was
pointing at.
“Thank you for the ride.” I said as I took my bag then
reached for the car door.
“Wait.” he said touching my shoulder lightly.
“Yes?” I asked with a slight smile, my heart skipping a
little faster.
He made a heartfelt laugh, which made me feel embarrassed
and I started thinking if I did something wrong.
“The way you smile…” he said gently gazing at me with his
deep blue eyes.
Silence enveloped us inside the car. He suddenly leans to
me closer. Suddenly I remembered that I better catch dinner. I sat up and open
the car door quickly. To my fright, my Mom is standing in front of the door
staring at me! Good thing the windows was darkly tinted.
“Hi Mom!’ I managed to say.
“Hi dear.” My Mom said as she looked at Kyle…
Uh-oh… er…
“Mom, this is Kyle. My friend whom we watched their
hockey practice.” I said quickly.
“Hi Mrs. Farren.” Kyle said politely
“Hello Kyle.” she said
“I better be going now. Goodbye Mrs. Farren. Goodbye
Kate.” he said as he started his car.
We had dinner at exactly 7:30 and my mom asked about
Kyle. All I said was that he is just a friend that I met at the school’s
organized party. She said that Kyle seems to be a good boy the way he brought
me home and greeted her.
***
Monday, at school, it was activity day. Club activities
were held during lunch- time. The news about the party was widely broadcasted
by Jean.
“Is it true that you actually met Kyle?! That really cute hockey leader?” Lane
gushed.
Before I could reply Macy, the sarcastic president of the
class cuts in.
“Well it’s probably for the last time.” she said highly
as she tilted her chin higher.
I felt furious and decided to answer her back but I chose
to remain calm.
“So what if I met him? There’s no trouble meeting a
civilized person like me.”
She cannot say anymore, since it’s obvious that she wants
Kyle as badly as the other girls and that she’ll do anything to catch his
attention.
After class ended, I decided to go home early since I
don’t have extension classes. I went directly to the parking lot, found my bus
service and was halfway inside when a voice called my name.
“Hello Kate.” A soft voice echoed to my ear as I walked…
I turned around to the voice’s direction… To my amazement
it’s Kyle. I never thought he’d drop by in our school.
“Hi.” I managed to say, making my voice louder for him to
hear.
“I just dropped by to see you.” he said shyly.
“Hmm… to see me?” I asked, surprised and feeling heat
creep up my face.
“Yeah. Actually I wanted to ask you to go out with me.”
he said slowly as if he is quite embarrassed to ask me that question…
“Oh…” My eyes roamed the lot and saw Jean at the far side
of the parking lot.
‘Trouble… Trouble…’ I thought.
I placed my books on the seat of the bus and went turned
back to him. I need time I thought. I took a deep breath and told him.
“Could you call me after dinner? I’ve got to think it
over.” I quickly tore off a sheet from my notebook and wrote down my phone
number then waved him off…
Whew! That’s a
hard thing to say. Especially with this guy, who’s got looks to kill for. I’m
having second thoughts, which very common for me… Most girls would say the
perfect words: “Oh I’d love to.” Instead of “Call me later.”
***
I went home and finished my chores and homework. The phone
rang. I grabbed it quickly thinking it was Kyle.
“Hi!” I said cheerfully.
It’s not Kyle but Jean!
“Hey Kate, what’s happening?” Jean asked
I forced my voice to be expressionless and a little
tired.
“Oh nothing.”
“Don’t say that. What Kyle said is what I wanted to
know.” she said quickly
I paused for a while, wondering if I should hang the
phone but Jean pleaded so I had no choice but to tell her.
“I’m expecting someone to call and the truth is Kyle is
going to call me today and you’re blocking the line.” I said airily
“Okay, okay. I’ll put down the phone.” Jean said curtly
As soon as I placed the phone back on the receiver, the
phone rang again and it was Kyle. I had made up my mind on what to say.
“Hi Kyle.” I said softly, still feeling nervous.
“So how’s your day?” he asked warmly.
I suddenly paused for awhile, not knowing what to say
next.
“Kate…? Kate..?” he said over the line.
“Uh! Sorry... Ye-
yeah… I had a good day.” I stammered.
“About asking you out. What’s your answer? It’s okay if
you don’t want to. I understand it anyway.” he said softly.
“No, it’s not that. I would like to go out with you.” I
finally said as I exhaled deeply.
“Really?” he answered in disbelief.
“Yes.” I said quickly.
We talked for a few more minutes. Kyle said he’d pick me
up in my house on Saturday, since it would be better on weekends than weekdays.
***
“Finally, you said yes.” Jean exclaimed shaking my
shoulders as if I won the lottery.
“Yes.” I said.. I seem to be saying that word so many
times…
“I’ll help you to dress up for Kyle.” Jean said sizing me
up.
“No thanks. I better do it my way.” I said quickly.
I don’t want Jean to ruin my date with Kyle. I want to be
the best and greatest date. I insisted for Jean to go home and I’ll just follow
her tips. I frantically searched my closet for a dress.
At last I found
a black dress that I bought a few weeks ago for the high school dance. The
style is sleeveless and above the knee while my footwear is a high-heeled black
sandal. I fixed my hair and put a little make up on and finally he arrived. My
Mom let Kyle in and stayed at the living room while she called me.
“I’m coming mom.” I said going to the living room to meet
him
There I saw him in looking attractive in a gray slacks
and blue polo shirt attire. I told my mom where she could reach me if gets
worried and the time I’m supposed to be home then I said goodbye to her.
We went to Hard Rock Café. Kyle bought tickets for their
feature concert is the Side A, my favorite band.
“Do you like the concert?” he said as he leaned closer to
me.
“Yes, they’re my favorite.” I replied.
“Would you like to dance?”
“Sure.” I stood up from the chair.
The band played the song “Hold On”. We went to the dance
floor. He held me close in his arms as we danced in accordance.
“I didn’t know that you had many talents… including
dancing. Leader in a hockey team, a good ice skater when it comes to dancing
and a great dancer on the dance floor.” I smiled
“You can say that. But, it’s because I enjoy your company
Kate,” he said softly
“I’m---.”
“Just dance Kate.” he said softly
We held each other close as we danced, until the last
slow dance. The concert was finished and just in time a souvenir picture was
taken.
“Would you like to take a pose sir?” the photographer
asked as he held his camera
“Sure. Two shots please.” he said casually.
We posed together for the picture, smiling. The
photographer thanked us and said to claim the picture an hour later. We had our
drinks to refresh us from dancing the whole time. We talked for an hour about
the things I like to do and he also talks about himself. We laughed a lot, enjoying each other’s
company.
“Well Kate it’s getting late. We better go now. I don’t
want your mom to get worried.” he said as he led me to the exit.
I went first then Kyle followed me, holding the envelope
containing the pictures. We went to his car and started the engine. I noticed,
as he drove, that he is thinking deeply. I never mind that, because he’s
concentrating on the road. I didn’t even know that I am already at my house.
“Here you go.” he said shortly his eyes still on the
street.
“Are you alright? You seemed to be pale.” I said placing
my hand on his shoulder.
He looked at me slowly. His eyes met mine. I felt that he is uncertain and unable to
speak but he managed to smile as he held my hand, which is laid, on his
shoulder.
“I’m alright. I’m just thinking…” he said taking off his
seatbelt.
I opened the car door and opened the gate and headed to
the main door to my amazement Kyle followed me.
“Do you want to come in and have some coffee?” I said
softly observing him more carefully.
“No, thanks. I’ll be just fine.” He answered.
“Kyle, I had a very good time with you and I enjoyed it a
lot. You’re such a nice guy.”
I tried to look at him, but there is still that
uncertainty and I can sense that he is troubled as if he wants to talk about
something to me but can’t.
“I better get going.” I said opening the door with my key
All of a sudden he took my hand and held it as I unlock
the door. I turned back to him. There was a momentary awkward silence as he
went closer to me.
“I also had a good time.” he said holding my hand and he
stroked my hair. Then, he kissed me on
my right cheek. My expression became blank. He looked at me.
“Maybe, we should go out again.” he said
“Sure. Be careful driving home Kyle.” I said quickly
sensing that he’s a little drunk while we were in the club. He doesn’t know
what he’s thinking about.
He went to his car and sped away. I went to my room and
changed my clothes. I had a great time with him.
***
The next few
days, I was sitting on my armchair doing an exercise on Math. I thought I was
safe but Jean popped up beside me.
“Guess, what happened?” she said eyeing to me. I ignored
her but she pulled my notebook away… So, I had no choice but to look at her,
annoyed.
“Some people saw you at the Hard Rock Café last Saturday.
I didn’t know that you’re going there.” she said.
“So, many people knows we went there. We had a great
time.” I said as I tried to get my notebook from her
“You’re so lucky.” she said softly.
But after that my face became solemn and lowering my
eyes. Jean became worried and asked me what happened - why I became quiet. I
told her that while Kyle and I were talking inside the car when going home, I
noticed that there’s something wrong with him. Jean told me it’s natural for a
guy to get a bit nervous. Still I can’t help but worry about him as I went
home. I noticed that there’s a bouquet of flowers on my desk.
“Flowers for me?!” I exclaimed.
I called my mom but she said that someone had delivered
it. I opened the enclosed letter, my hands a bit shaky.
I felt my heart
beat faster as I read what’s written inside.
“I’m falling for you… I think that I’m in
love you…. - Kyle”
“Oh my---.” I stammered
The phone rang. Once… Twice… Thrice... I was tempted not
to answer. But my conscience told me it might be Jean so I picked up the phone.
“What is it this time Jean?” I quickly said over the
line.
There was a
pause over the line… It is most definitely is her…
“Heelllloooo
Jean!” I said once again, annoyed… How we ever became best friends… I do not
know!
What a big
mistake I made by braying on the line for it was Kyle!